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The last two days have been very strange for me. I spent most of yesterday morning calling friends and relatives, and letting them know Dad had died. I was OK with most of them, though the more upset they were by the news, the more upset I was. The afternoon Mum and I spent in the garden, picking blackberries, and the plums that Dad loved but didn't get to enjoy, because ironically this is the first year the tree has actually fruited. We pottered about, lopped some branches (I know, wrong time of year), and did the laundry, just keeping busy. I took both of us out for Chinese last night just to stop us sitting staring at the walls, and I think we both got the first good night's sleep we've had after spending 9 nights in the hospital on a camp-bed (Mum) and a reclining chair (me). Today I was finally able to start doing practical stuff. With yesterday being a Bank Holiday I couldn't do anything official, but this afternoon I went to the hospital, picked up the death certificate and was able to go and register the death. It's only after that has been done that you can actually set a date and time for the funeral, so we've been in limbo till now. Everything is now fixed, thank God, and I can take the evening to try and relax a little. Tags: dad, health, parents
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Just to let anyone wondering where I've been know that I've been at the hospital since Saturday morning. My Dad was taken ill very suddenly on Friday night, with what was initially thought to be a stroke. Two CT scans on Saturday showed no sign of stroke, but showed up three lesions, which seem likely to be secondary tumours, on his brain. These made him have repeated fits all day on Saturday until the doctors finally prescribed medication to stop the fits, but also seem to have cause him to start up with a truly horrendous chest infection. He has not opened his eyes since then, apart from briefly on Sunday, but I know he didn't recognise us, and in fact doubt he really saw anything. At present, he is being treated with anti-biotics for the infection, steroids for the inflammation resulting from the lesions, sedatives to keep him calm, fluids to keep him hydrated, and morphine when necessary. I've asked questions, badgered the doctors, the nurses and the consultant, and now there's nothing more I can do. They say if he's going to improve at all, and it seems unlikely, it will be in the next 24-48 hours. Mum and I are sleeping at the hospital, and I've only come home now to get some clean clothes, have a shower, and run some urgent errands for Mum. We'll stay put till it's over, now. It's been so hard sitting watching my Dad deteriorate and knowing nothing I do or say can make any difference. He would hate being like this, and the idea that if he does come through this crisis but may never be able to walk or get around or look after himself again would break his heart much as it's doing to mine right now. I just needed to get this out of my system now so I can go back to the hospital and support my Mum through this. Tags: dad, health, parents
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I've come back to Mont Blanc again, this time in the middle of the day, rather than at sunset. I love the clouds of snow being blown around on its summit, as well as the pristine snow in the foreground. Meanwhile, Mum is still in hospital as they wait to see whether her heartbeat will regularise as the antibiotics take effect properly. They're now saying that she may be allowed home at the weekend. They haven't specified what "the weekend" means... Dad's now worried that she may not feel up to travelling to my place for Christmas... I'm trusting that she will and simply continuing with preparations. If she wants to stay home, then I'll just fling everything in the car on Christmas Eve and try and fight my way north... To continue with the Christmas theme, I baked the vanillekipferl and the lebkuchen last night. They're both extremely good, especially the lebkuchen, which are much nicer (and far more peppery) than the shop-bought ones. Next it's jam tarts, mince pies and if I can lay hands on the recipe, the ground-rice tarts my Mum always makes. I'm not the world's greatest pastry maker (my hands are too warm), but I'll give it a go! And this morning I ordered the smoked salmon, a very small ham, and some smoked eel. I now need to shop for the one Christmas present I haven't been able to buy online, and for the next lot of baking ingredients (to say nothing of the stuffing for the goose, and those red cabbages the idiots in Tescos failed to supply). I have no idea how my Mum used to cope with the Christmas preparations at home when she and Dad were both at work full-time. I mean, the baking last night ate up a good two hours of my time, and I only have two tubs of biscuity things to show for it... And all this without a mixing bowl too! Whatever happens, I'm taking tonight off to go to the cinema. We shall see "King Kong" tonight at an early showing and then go out to the Rice Bowl for a Chinese meal. I'll worry about the baking/cooking/shopping/present wrapping afterwards! Tags: christmas, cooking, domesticity, food, health, parents, photos
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My Dad just called to say my Mum's been taken to hospital today. I'm not too worried as we know exactly what it is. Mum's asthmatic, and managed to go down with whatever it is we've all had here. The cold seems to have tipped into a chest infection, and it's got steadily worse over the weekend. Dad finally called the doctor today, as she didn't seem to be getting any better. The doctor came to the house, took a listen and suggested hospital as well as extra strong steroids to try and sort the situation out. Mum tried to resist the idea of hospital, but very sensibly Dad insisted. She'd have done the same to him... Apparently she's being seen by a specialist around 5pm today, and Dad should have more news later when he goes back for visiting hours. Needless to say, I'm far less worried than I was last time he was in hospital, but even so I'm in a bit of a state about it. I can't go home tomorrow, because I have a dentist's appointment that it took me 3 months to get. I daren't cancel it; I probably wouldn't get another one before 2007 and I have three fillings that need replacing... after that, we'll see. Tags: health, parents
Current Mood:  worried
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Again, I'm going with a French snowscape, this one being a view from outside the little village of Combloux. It's just lovely with snow all over everything, and the clouds are wonderful... Love 'em! On other news, I'm still sick and it's really beginning to annoy me. I went back to the doctor's this morning and now have yet another batch of antibiotics. Hopefully these will work, because I've had about as much of this as I can take. We went out yesterday in pursuit of Christmas food items, and came back with a batch of meats from the Farmers' Market, being held on a Sunday because it would otherwise have been after Christmas if they'd stuck with the 4th Tuesday of the month. I was disappointed not to be able to get a goose, but have since tracked down a source of organic free-range geese that turns out to be on my way to work in the morning. I left a message for them to call me, so we'll see how that goes. I also got more venison, so as to be sure there's enough for New Year's Eve dinner. After the market we went to Waddesdon, hoping to get a look at the house, which is apparently now decorated for Christmas. However, it was such a glorious day that the place was absolutely heaving with people. We arrived a little after 2pm, and were told the timed entry to the house meant that we couldn't go in till 4.30. After a walk round the grounds, eyeing up the statues all wrapped up for winter, and staring longingly at the collection of Bentleys and Rolls-Royces parked in front of the house, we decided I was probably not well enough to stick it out for another hour hour and a half. We handed our tickets back and left, coming home for a lazy evening in the warmth, with the tree (put up on Saturday afternoon) all lit up in the background. ETA:I found this picture of the interior and am now even more disappointed at not being able to get in... Tags: christmas, food, health, photos, sightseeing, travel
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Been working at home today, which is a good thing, as I still feel very woolly headed. It's a bad thing in that I didn't get as much done as I probably should have, but I did get a lot more done than I would if I'd had to drive the hour and a half to work this morning and then face the 45 minute trek back as well. I'm hoping that the antibiotics will start to do their thing soon, because right now I'm wheezing horribly - sounds like a badly oiled door in fact. However, by tomorrow I do expect I'll be fit to go back to work. In other news, wonders will never cease! I just had an email from the SRO with attached form asking us to apply for the 2006 media passes for the F3/GT championships. This is a whole eight weeks in advance (and must be considered progress on last years' 8 days in advance) of the deadline for applications... Amazing. I'm gobsmacked, frankly. So ours are filled in; we just need a pair of passport photos and printouts of the 2005 reports, which I shall do at work on the new, shiny and above all blindingly fast printer. Tags: health, motor racing, motorsport
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Drop Back 
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